my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
