im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
