Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
