Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Of course I have a pirate flag
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
