ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Princesses don't give blow jobs
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Randomize