Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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