mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize