We won't sleep together?
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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