this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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