Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
My brain says no but my pants say off.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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