I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Randomize
