My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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