Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
two words...techno handjob
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
