She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
