Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
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i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
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Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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