idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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