maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
