Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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