i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
