he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Randomize
