it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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