Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(323): View more from California

hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.

(323): View more from California

to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.

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(323): hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun. (323): to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend. http://tfl.nu/i9i1

Replies (17) Good night (975) Bad night (4046)
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(916): View more from California

How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.

(1-916): View more from California

Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.

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(916): How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids. (1-916): Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions. http://tfl.nu/28ax

Replies (27) Good night (4024) Bad night (1180)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Five things that make you perfect. Go.

(1-918): View more from Oklahoma

The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.

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(918): Five things that make you perfect. Go. (1-918): The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses. http://tfl.nu/ni7m

Replies (26) Good night (6483) Bad night (1100)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?

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(860): Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be? http://tfl.nu/i247

Replies (10) Good night (6776) Bad night (655)
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(314): View more from Missouri

He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?

(1-314): View more from Missouri

No. Take one for the team.

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(314): He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed? (1-314): No. Take one for the team. http://tfl.nu/7euo

Replies (19) Good night (1246) Bad night (4071)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.

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(405): I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes. http://tfl.nu/im6u

Replies (43) Good night (4652) Bad night (836)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

we've started having sober sex

(203): View more from Connecticut

you really do like him

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(860): we've started having sober sex (203): you really do like him http://tfl.nu/ocmd

Replies (19) Good night (8870) Bad night (1024)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"

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(+44): If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine" http://tfl.nu/ib5o

Replies (6) Good night (1026) Bad night (535)
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(416): View more from Toronto

I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.

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(416): I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting. http://tfl.nu/0atv

Replies (10) Good night (557) Bad night (1113)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.

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(306): No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit. http://tfl.nu/ncdk

Replies (5) Good night (1297) Bad night (638)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later

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(215): shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later http://tfl.nu/zlh0

Replies (5) Good night (914) Bad night (273)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

do you want to shower with me?

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower

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(973): do you want to shower with me? (215): only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower http://tfl.nu/5xd8

Replies (3) Good night (885) Bad night (348)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative

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(610): Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative http://tfl.nu/dzmt

Replies (3) Good night (659) Bad night (557)
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(503): View more from Oregon

Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!

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(503): Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered! http://tfl.nu/55g9

Replies (8) Good night (933) Bad night (328)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho

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(617): woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho http://tfl.nu/i91s

Replies (2) Good night (566) Bad night (225)

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