so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
