Buhtt sex?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
third nipple confirmed
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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