Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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