I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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