I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
