So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
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my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
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His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You did what with his pubic hair?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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