dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Randomize
