1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize