Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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