I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
