I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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