I don't think brook has ever known best
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
So squirting runs in the family.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I am available for nakedness