Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
