...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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