I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
how does that bad decision feel?
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