AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
