so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
