am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize