you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
There was a lot of him and a little penis
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
