Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
