I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
