my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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