you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
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