i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
