I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
