It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
