i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize