If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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