Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
